My Baby is 2!

Happy birthday, baby! You are an absolute joy, a ball of laughter, a strong-willed spitfire, and a tremendous blessing to our family (well, maybe not to the kitten)-I can't imagine life without your chubby smiling face. I love you!

New Cousin in the Family

My sister gave birth to a beautiful baby boy last nite (well, early today I guess-3:15 a.m.) and he is a whopper-9 lbs 4 oz. So cute but a big boy! This is her SIXTH child-woohoo for her family! They have 3 boys and 3 girls so they could have some good family team competitions :) She went in to be induced at midnight so I was up most of the nite staying with her other 5 kiddos and waiting to hear news and canning pear butter-I had to do SOMETHING to pass the time :) While I have been fine most of the day and have hung in there, the 3 hours of sleep are now kicking my butt so I'm off to bed. I cannot help but think how amazing it would be if our baby was born the same day-how cool would that be??? But at the rate referrals are flying, who knows?! I do know things are just a bit better with one more sweet nephew in my family.

God is so good.

Whittled Down to 7

I was tagged by Jana and Dawn both so here goes!

1. I LOVE to sing. A lot. And I suppose I have a decent voice-I recorded a CD for the husband for his b-day one year. But the weird part is, I am PETRIFIED to sing in front of other people by myself. When recording said CD, I asked the studio guy to put me in a room off to the side where he couldn't see me when I sang and when I gave it to my husband, I sat in the other room so he couldn't look at me while he listened to it. And to make it weirder, I sing on the worship team at my church-I love it so much and am getting better at overcoming my fear since I think the Lord gave me the gift of song to be used to glorify Him, but still freak out a little if people can actually hear me a lot. I have issues with people pleasing and I think that I am afraid that people will be less than pleased with me if I don't sound perfect. No, it does not make sense. Yes, it is stupid.

2. I love soda. Have since converted to diet which is good-well, Coke Zero mostly. It is less for the caffeine and more for that sweet sweet burn of the fizz when you take that first sip-ahhhhhhh. A day without it is NOT a good one for me.

3. I have a wee bit of a grammar obsession and cannot STAND it when people end a sentence with a preposition. ( I think this shirt is the greatest and would totally wear it if it was made in a less dorky style) It takes every bit of self-control I have to not correct them. The husband finds this both funny and annoying, depending on whom I am correcting :).

4. Wet things give me the heebie-jeebies big time. Not like a swimming pool or shower or anything that is SUPPOSED to be wet, but when wet bits of water are clinging to things and then I touch them, like the bathroom sink after someone else has used it or sweaty cup in the summer or whatever, GROSS. And if there is any hair that is in the wetness??? OH. MY. GOSH.

5. I like to knit a lot. I used to do it a lot more and it was a bit of an obsession for awhile and I have enough yarn in my house to knit for a few years but I will still buy more if I see some that I like. I did reduce a large percentage of my "stash" by sending a gigantic box of it to an orphanage in Ethiopia where the girls were learning to knit as a profitable life skill so I felt happy about mixing my 2 passions. Now I spend the majority of my "knitting time" obsessively reading blogs and adoption listserves :)

6. I really like cheese. As in, a LOT. So much in fact that my nephew gave me a bar of cheese one year for a birthday gift, my nieces all drew pictures of me as a mouse living in a cheese house, and they asked my sister (their mom) if she thought I might have my headstone made out of cheese when I die. Nice.

7. I have developed a loathing for jeans because they "squeeze me" in a way that I am not happy with. I like the APPEARANCE of jeans mind you, just not the effect of them on my body. And this is not just a weight issue, although the squeeze has, ahem, increased a bit in recent years. But even when I was skinny, I did not like the way they felt all heavy and confining on me and the button jabbed me in the tummy and now that I am out of college and not trying to keep up the appearance of coolness at every moment (or really any moments it seems, much to the growing embarrassment of my oldest daughter), I spend much more time in non-jeans and it makes me happy. I am also going to confess that they most often have elastic waistbands (see above issue with the button factor) but they are nice, yoga-type pants, not old lady wear. Life is too short to spend it in uncomfortable pants!!!!!!

There you have it! A bit of my weird, randomness for you to enjoy. I am too tired right now to think of anyone to tag who has not already been tagged so if I think of someone good, I will change it later :) and like Renee said, if you are reading this and have not been tagged, consider this a tag and and air that randomness!!

What Can Brown Do For You?

Recently Thing 3, my almost 2 year old with adorable fat rolls on her cute little forearms, has developed a fierce love of baby dolls. Baby dolls that are usually not hers. Baby dolls that belong to the church nursery and kid rooms. I spend a lot of time there doing childcare for various ministry groups-sometimes 3 days a week-so it doesn't bother me much when she wants to "borrow" one when we leave b/c I know we'll be back the next day and can just return it. Like a baby library of sorts. (baby DOLLS of course-not real babies-the would be weird, people) But thie week, a new part of her baby love has developed. She only wants to love on, rock and take home the brown babies. It is entirely based on her naturally seeing beauty in them b/c since she is still mostly a "baby" herself, she knows very little about our adoption other than to point at my Africa necklace and say "Baby!" (based on a wee bit of prompting from her Mama). She was carrying around a peach-colored baby and a brown baby the other day and it was time to go. Since we already had one purloined bean-bag infant sitting on the counter at home (I forgot to bring it back that day-whoops), I told her to put the babies back. She very sweetly handed me the peach-colored one to put on the shelf, then fiercely clutched the brown one to her chest, patted the baby, said "my!" ("mine" for those who don't speak Toddler), and walked away with her little one. I have to admit, while I am not condoning disobedience or theft, that little brown baby doll is still at our house and she has not put it down since and I love it. Her birthday is in 2 weeks and I know exactly what she will be getting from us! It has been sweet to watch my little spitfire be so sweet and tender toward her little baby and I am thinking she may just turn out to be a nice big sister after all (we have been a little concerned-she's pretty possessive of her things, particularly her Mom) But most of all, it has brought tears to my eyes as I think about the day when I am handed my own little brown beauty and I can clutch it to my chest and say, with praise to my almighty God, "my".

What Number Do You See?

WOW!

on the girls list ...........................................on the boys list

(by the way, "unofficially" I think we are #13 on the girls list I think b/c there were 3 referrals the other day but they are not official yet so those folks are still counted on the waiting list-c'mon baby!)

ps-If you are color blind, we are #16 girls, #12 boys :)

You Do The Hokie Pokie And You Turn Yourself About

I thought I'd give you a little glimpse into my life outside of adopting (like there is a life outside?? Sometimes it doesn't seem like it when you're in the middle of it!!) It was Homecoming this past weekend here in Blacksburg at Virginia Tech and we always love Homecoming weekend-it is the best parade all year (which really isn't saying much but we like our small town parades :) ) and the kids love it-they get tons of candy from all the sorority girls in the parade who "ooh" and "ahh" over how cute they are-b/c they do not yet have any children!!! Said sorority girls also walk the whole parade in stiletto heels so maybe they are a bit delirious-my daughter calls them the "shiny girls". Here are few pics from our weekend:

3 Hokie cuties!

Some of the Cadets in the parade (Thing 1 took this picture-not bad, eh?)
Aforementioned Shiny Girls (oh my feet!)

Yours truly serving up nachos at the Tech football game-my daughters' school operates a concessions booth at the stadium and I work most of the games-we get a portion of the proceeds--it truly is a FUNdraiser (haha, the cheese!)

There you have it, a Saturday in the life of a Hokie family during football season! My husband went to Virginia Tech and now works there as well and I went there for grad school so the Hokie blood runs thick in this house. Can't wait to make a Hokie out of our little Ethiopian sweetie!

Worrywart

So, I have a confession to make. I am a worrier. I like to mentally analyze an issue to death, and then fret about it some more after that. I am not the out-loud, whiny worrier-type though--no, I prefer to lay awake half the night, mulling over all the "what ifs" and then spend all my quiet moments of the day doing the same thing. And boy, as a mom, do I have a lot of worry-fodder! In fact, if I start to run out of worry-fuel, I can just worry about how much I worry! Sometimes it IS good to think things through and analyze them so you are not walking blindly into a situation, but it is easy to let the thinking and wondering turn into genuine worry. When we were considering adopting from Ethiopia, I had a million things I worried, er, wondered, about. How will I take care of an Ethiopian child's hair? Will other people in our family have negative reactions? Should we add another child to our already nutso family? Do Ethiopian children sunburn like I do? How long will it take? Is this just a "whim" that I will act on and then back out on? Will I love this child just the same as the other Things since it will look and feel so different than what I know as a mom-and yes, I do mean literally look so different-I have no issue whatsoever with race, obviously, but it is just so different than what I've ever done before, you know? I have to say, that last one is the one I worried about the most (and worried about even sharing it with everyone). And honestly, it is still the one that likes to plague me when I am feeling tired and worn out, and lacking in sleep, and most of all lacking in time with the Lord. (ok, and when I have PMS-yeah, I said it) There are days when I just feel like "what were we thinking?" about this adoption, because I just don't feel cut out for the job. And oddly, as we inch closer on the waiting list, the worries get a little louder. Some days bringing home our baby is just so crazy of a concept that I cannot fathom it actually happening and then I just feel like maybe I misunderstood what God was telling us. And I worry about my other girls-what if all the kids don't gel? What if things are too weird of an adjustment? And the worst, most horrible-feeling worry of all, what if we regret it? Now, please do not be angry with me, I am trying to be super real and honest about my innermost thoughts. I feel like this is hard to say because so much of what is seen in the adoption community is incredible excitement and joy about the journey and I do feel that way, most of the time. But like I said, there are times when these little whispers come through my thoughts and I feel alone with them, like if I dared to share them with other adoptive parents, they would think I was crazy and maybe shouldn't in fact be adopting at all. However, I don't think this is the case because I distinctly remember feeling this exact same way when I was pregnant with all three Things (well, except the Ethiopian hair issue, I mean I pretty much counted that issue out). That fear of "oh no, can I get out of this? what the heck will I do with another baby? who thought this was a good idea?" that seemed to creep in at the most inopportune times was there with all my pregnancies and I think it is the same fear that is here with this adoption. It is the fear of the unknown, the not knowing what to expect, and the irrevocability of it. I know without a doubt God has asked us to walk this path, and that is what I cling to when I feel consumed with my questions and worries (well, that and some PMS meds and chocolate, but I digress...) and I know that I should not be anxious or worry about anything, according to Philippians 4:6-7, and I do lay these thoughts at the feet of Jesus regularly. And I know that at first sight of my babies, I was incredibly, irrevocably, intensely, unconditionally in love with them. But honestly, I do worry, like any expecting parent I suppose. I have been encouraged by other folks, like Melissa Faye Greene (in articles like this) and Mary from Owlhaven when they have written about concerns, worries, and even post adoptive depression. This adoption brings with it new sets of concerns-things I never really thought would float across the expanse of my mind-and I want to ask other adopting parents, do you worry about this stuff too sometimes? If you do, would you be willing to share those feelings from time to time so we can all encourage one another, not just in the exciting times, but in the scary, uncertain times, too? Or if you have "been there, done that" and are on the other side of things with your sweet one home, can you share that, too? It is nice to know that these feelings are normal and that we have folks running this marathon with us, as well as those cheering us on from the finish line.